There are two ways to look at this question: From a business perspective, and from a creative perspective.

From a business perspective, you have to start by looking at the recent history of the franchise and the current marketplace. Star Trek on TV was losing more and more viewers as time went by, until the final series Enterprise was canceled. Was this an indication of declining interest, quality, or both? I won't debate the quality question, but will say that viewership for almost ALL shows was declining in the last years of Enterprise, and has continued to decline since (even hit shows have less "eyeballs" than even five years ago).

So, you have declining viewership to deal with. Home video sales of TV seasons, once a fat profit center for studios, has become far less so as well (with the advent of streaming and a weak economy, many fans skip buying the series of DVD or bluray). Star Trek as a licensed property (for books, games, toys, T-shirts, etc.) is still pulling in a nice "annuity" for Paramount… would a new series provide for additional licensing opportunities? Sure, but licensing fees won't cover the production cost of a show (unless it's incredibly popular or the show is very cheap to produce).

That last point is key: Even if you take advantage of standing sets, costumes, and props, a Star Trek show is very expensive show to make, and requires a big investment… and because of the many reasons cited above, Hollywood is in a very "risk averse" phase right now. If a TV producer has to choose between an expensive SF show or a three-camera sitcom, a cop show, or a reality show… they'll pick the cheap show. One can make an argument that Star Trek has a built-in audience, one that will show up week after week… but the counter arguement is a very blunt one: when Enterprise was on the air, the ratings weren't there… and the ratings have not been there for other SF shows such as Fringe or Terra Nova.

And not just ratings, but demographics: Are Star Trek fans in that desirable 18 to 35 demographic? Based on my research, the JJ Abrams 2009 Trek movie brought a LOT of new fans to the franchise… and many of them are in that coveted group. Will they tune in to a TV show every week, though? That's a big question.

So, is there a business reason for Star Trek to be on TV again? Maybe, if the numbers work out. How can they? The obvious solution is an animated series, a la Star Wars The Clone Wars. It would be cheaper to produce, it would allow the producers the opportunity to do scenes and aliens that would be difficult to do in live action, and if it strikes the right tone it could appeal to adults and kids alike. And the upside to an animated series is it would helps grow the fanbase in a different way than a new film does.  It wouldn't be prime time Star Trek like we've had before, but it would still be Trek on TV again.

Now, the creative question: Are there any more stories to be told? Can a new Star Trek series again take us to where no one has gone before? It depends on the talent involved. A good example when it comes to this is the other famous SF TV franchise, Doctor Who. The show has had various showrunners over the years, and many episodes were really bad… But even some of the best creative people can have a bad day. The deeper problem occurs when you have bad SEASONS, not just the occassional episode. This happened on Doctor Who, and this decline in quality led to declining viewers and the halt in production for several years.

I bring this up as a case study of what to avoid. If you get the wrong showrunner and writing staff behind a new Star Trek show, then you will sabotage the notion before it even begins. There's always possibilities, Spock said… possibilities to tell good stories with interesting characters in the Star Trek universe. Go forward thousands of years past Kirk and Spock, do an anthology show with different ships and crews on different misisons, do a Starfleet Academy show, do a Starfleet Black Ops show… There's lots of "space" to play in.

If you don't have the talent to tell such stories, though… then you shouldn't even try.

See question on Quora

It’s a stylistic flourish that he likes, many directors have similar “affectations” that aren’t as obvious (the angle of a shot, or a tendency to use extreme close ups or tracking shots).

A similar example: Quentin Tarantino’s obsession with close ups of feet, especially women’s bare feet. It’s a personal touch of both directors, though at least JJ’s couldn’t be misinterpreted as a “fetish”… Yet.

See question on Quora

Upper management is far far away…

As in, several million light years away. Networking opportunities are rare. The only “face time” that you get is the occassional chat with an admiral, and then it’s usually the typical “there’s a situation on Deneb IV” and “you’re the only ship in the quadrant” stuff. Murder on career advancement.

Communication is often one way.

“Incoming message from Starfleet Command” is frequently the only information you get from management, and then it’s usually in response to a crisis. It’s pretty much the same way management at large organizations here on Earth communicates with their workers – a blanket (e-mail) message.

Middle management usually sucks.

Every time we meet a “middle manager” in the original Star Trek or on the Next Generation (a Commodore or Ambassador – not quite an Admiral, but superior to Captains), they were usually incomptent, evil, or both. Most notable example: Commodore Decker from Doomsday Machine and Ambassador Fox from A Taste of Armageddon. A rare exception was Spock’s dad Ambassador Sarek, though he eventually became non compos mentus….

Certain people aren’t cut out for a desk job.

Captaining a starship was James T. Kirk’s first, best destiny… and by accepting promotion he wasted his potential. He should have been out there hoppin’ galaxies rather than shuffling paperwork.

Even good managers can make mistakes.

Kirk got obsessed with a space cloud and pursued inappropriate sexual relations with WAY too many women. Picard let children on the bridge. The key is that good managers, flaws and all, learn from their mistakes and get better.

Good managers are responsible and concerned about their team.

“I’m responsible for the lives of 430 crewmen!” Good managers care and are “where the buck stops” when it comes to the performance and well being of their “crew.”

See question on Quora

He was crestfallen.

The actor John DeLancie was standing in front of an auditorium filled with hundreds of people. It was August 2011, at the official Star Trek convention. Best known for his role of Q in Star Trek: the Next Generation, he had just name-dropped the TV series Breaking Bad. DeLancie had just appeared on that show in it’s second year, playing the father of a recovering drug addict. He was nominated for an Emmy for this work. It was an amazing performance, on an amazing show.

None of the people in the audience had seen it. Except, apparently, me.

Because it wasn’t science fiction. It wasn’t Star Trek.

“Any of you watch a show called Breaking Bad?” he had asked, and when only one person – me – clapped… he shrugged, and then said, sadly, “You should watch it… It’s a good show.” He then moved on to another topic.

That moment… And the idea that all these people were so obsessed with one thing – Star Trek – make me sad, too.

We are living in a golden age, and available to us in an instant is any number of amazing works. Some of the best television ever is being produced, not to mention the huge library that has come before. We have some fantastic films that are being made… They just aren’t always in your local megatheatre. Writing, art, design… We have a gets of riches available to us, sometimes at the click of a mouse.

So, to come to my core point: don’t limit yourself. Explore, try new things. Open yourself up to things that are outside your comfort zone.

Learn. Live. And love more than just one genre or show. Yes, Virginia, there is more to the world than just Star Trek.

Here's some of the factors that come into play.

A key one: Shatner has lived through lean times in the past (post Trek he ended up doing TV commercials for margarine)… And so when the work comes, he grabs it and does it. Those lean times makes you appreciate the work when it comes. And makes you hungry for more.

Second, he's a driven personality. I've known people who works with the Shat and when he works he works really really hard. He gives it "all he's got, Captain." He and I share that – the idea of "relaxing"… well, other people do that. He can't stop working. He'll stop when he's dead.

Third, he's a pro. He shows up, hits his marks, does his lines, and will draw an audience just because of his history and what he has done. The industry knows that and they respect professionalism (as well as the "draw an audience" part).

Finally, he has changed over time. Once a leading man, he has transitioned into a character actor as well as (as needed and when appropriate) a semi-characture of himself… he does what he thinks is necessary to keep working, to keep moving forward. He's a smart talented man.

See question on Quora

My friend, the actress Mary Czerwinski, is a Star Trek fan. A BIG Star Trek fan. So she very much wants a part in the next Star Trek movie. To that end, she has created a website called Make me Dehner, because she thinks she would be perfect to play the part Elizabeth Dehner (introduced in the original Star Trek pilot) and I agree. Please visit the site and lend your support – you’ll also find video recommendations from various Star Trek personalities… And one from some ruggedly handsome guy named Joseph Dickerson…

My pal Anthony Pascale from Trekmovie.com asked me to do a quick video review of the new Star Trek PADD app for the iPad and, since I’m on holiday, I was able to put together one. Here it is:

Many many moons ago, My friend John and I went on a quest, a sacred trek to see… well, costumes and props from a show made before either one of us were born. It was 1992 and the Smithsonian had a special exhibit showcasing Star Trek. Here’s some of the photos of the day we spent, almost 20 years ago…

Had the great chance 11 months ago to attend a private party celebrating the launch of The Intergalactic Bartender beverage guide, based on the notorious concoctions that were once served at the Star Trek Experience. My friends John and Mary did a promotional video for the party, and here it is.

You’ll see a ruggedly handsome man dressed like a hipster doofus around the 1 minute mark you may recognize…

A… Fascinating question.

I’d say that the key is to NOT start with the movies. A movie is a two-hour investment and all the movies require some kind of understanding of the “back story” of the characters and the universe… Yes, even the latest film Star Trek. Though (and some fanboys are going to yell and throw things at me for saying this) the JJ Abrams Star Trek is a great intro to the series and characters for new viewers – that was the intent of it, after all…

Have to say, the best way to introduce Star Trek is with classic Trek, and with one of two episodes: City on the Edge of Forever or Balance of Terror. The first, one of the best episodes of the series, and the second, a very well-written and acted production that is quite gripping and entertaining. Both episodes are character-driven, which is one of the reasons Trek is so well-regarded: the best Star Trek is about characters we care about going, to coin a phrase, where no man has gone before…

See question on Quora

I read some comments from the filmmakers about this, and they say that this was pure coincidence, and they just thought the song was a good one for the scene. I think they are being honest.

The REAl question is, if the Beastie Boys exist in the Star Trek universe then how could they sing about Spock and his nerve pinch in the song “Intergalactic?” How would they know of Spock if he is “real?” My theory is that one of the Beasties was at some point on a bus in San Francisco… The same one Kirk and Spock was in Star Trek IV. He overheard them talking, saw Spock give the pinch, and filed that data away to use later…

See question on Quora

Trek Movie is having a video contest to celebrate the upcoming International Talk Like William Shatner day (which is also his 80th birthday), and since I have a hard time NOT talking like William Shatner, I had to post a video entry:

"Better" is in the eye of the beholder. A movie is both a collaborative effort and the vision of a director – a good director can work from a bad script with top-notch actors, a good editor and a fantastic cinematographer to make an entertaining movie… Or they can make a bad movie. So, you can evaluate the movie as a whole or you can look at the elements that make up the movie.

To me, three of the earlier Star Trek movies are great movies, full stop, where all the elements just click and work. They also happen to be Trek 2, 4, and 6 – which is where the famous "only even numbered Star Trek movies are good" cliche came from. I also think that the new reboot/sequel/prequel Star Trek is a great movie, where everything (well, except some of the contrived plot points that "brought the crew together") worked. The fact that no one viewing the movie had to have any knowledge of the original show was also a major reason it was successful… But that's not the question, so…

In summary, I'd say it's not better, just a different take on the material that worked very well. Most of the original movies are just as good… But just not all of them are (again, look for the even numbers).

And of course, Star Trek II: the Wrath of Khan is the Citizen Kane of Trek. This is an absolute fact that cannot be denied by any sentient beings who appreciate Star Trek.

See question on Quora

Instead of relaxing yesterday I got caught up in another great Twitter hashtag, #thingsstartrektaughtme (Things Star Trek taught me). Here’s my contributions:

• Touch typing on LCARS interfaces is a vital job skill in the future.
• You canna change the laws of physics.
• Don’t let anyone named Decker command a starship.
• Temperature is a vital point to consider when serving Revenge.
• Of all the many possible occupations available in the universe, McCoy was a doctor. Not anything else.
• There are always possibilities.
• Most aliens we will meet in the future look exactly like us, save for aspects of their ears and foreheads.
• Never let @williamshatner direct a Star Trek movie.
• Vulcans never bluff.

Working in Australia has some benefits,  one of them being that there are different release dates than other countries… Like the United States, for example. In the US the coffee-table book Star Trek 365 from Abrams Publishing won’t come out until September 1st, but it’s been on sale here for almost a month. So, being the obsessive Star Trek fan I am, I had to pick it up.

So, how is it? Well, I’ve never owned any of the other 365 books, so the format is new to me, but I like it. It basically takes you through a “year” of Star Trek, with each day covering another aspect of the Original Series (yes, I put that in title case… Deservedly so).

The structure is great as a chronological conceit… even though it covers the three years of the first series and things that also happened many years later. The writing by Paula M. Block and Terry J. Erdmann does an admirable job of providing details that even the die-hard Star Trek fan might not know. And the photos… Oh, my, the photos.

The layout is copy and content (sometimes with small photos) on the left hand page, and full page photos or images/collages on the right hand page. Some of the images they have found are just fantastic, and it is truly impressive to page through (see images below).

So is it worth it? Absolutely. I dare say even a casual fan would appreciate this unique hardcover volume. And for $20 on Amazon, it’s a bargain.

As I sit in the airport about to head back to Sydney for work, I wanted to put together some quick thoughts I had on the Star Trek convention I just attended in Las Vegas. It was my second Vegas Trek con, and while I only attended two of the four days I had a great time. Here’s some of my quick rambling recollections:

Recollection 1: John de Lancie, who played Q, made the best point I have ever heard an actor make about Trek fans (even better than Shatner’s “get a life”). Paraphrasing: “it’s like you threw this great dinner party 20 years ago, and people don’t ask you about the party… They ask you about buying the groceries. They ask you… What were you thinking when you picked up the potato… And then put it back… When it wasn’t the right potato.” Remember folks, these people are actors… They live in the moment and then they do…. Surprisingly… More acting, sometimes not even on Star Trek!

After de Lancie made this very subtle yet very obvious point, half of the audience questions were still in the vein of “tell us about what you were thinking when…” Sigh.

Recollection 2: They really really really need to prescreen interview questions, or have a moderator ask them for most of the panel. Fans just are not good interviewers. Heck, I’m a trained journalist and I sometimes ask embarrassing questions when I’m confronted with people I respect and admire…

Recollection 3: When John de Lancie (yes, him again – he’s one of my favorite actors) asked if anyone in the 1000+ sear theatre he was speaking in asked if anyone had seen Breaking Bad (the best show on TV, and one he did a fantastic recurring role on a while back) only three people – including me – applauded. That made me very very sad. Trek fans, expand your horizons!

Recollection 4: The parties at the con were great, rivaling some of the best conference parties I’ve ever attended. At least, I think they were… I can’t remember much. Special thanks to Rod Roddenberry and Lisa from the Intergalactic Bartender for a great time.

Recollection 5: Met some great great new friends at the con – connections I hope will survive me going out of the country for a while. You know who you are, you wonderful people you!

Recollection 6: The new Star Trek reboot has divided a lot of fans, but I will say this: it has also brought lots of new fans into the fold. Especially young women. Who look REEALLLY good wearing original series miniskirt costumes. A nice diversion from some of the typical costume goers you see…. And speaking of which…

Recollection 7: Trek fans, I love ya… But before you try on that original series outfit, buy a mirror. And for some of you… Consider some cardio.

Recollection 8: I love David Gerrold and I love The Martian Child. Read it, all of you.

Final recollection: I love Trek, and I really enjoyed the con, but I can see a real difference between fans who attend. There are some who are just wonderfully open and friendly and then some that are… Well, not so. They are not to be pitied or criticized, they just don’t seem happy. I think to them a convention like this is more ritual than enjoyment, like people who go to church long after they stopped believing in what it was the church represented.

I understand – I stopped doing conventions for over 10 years because I wanted to focus my energy on building my career… And now that I have “arrived” to some extent, I can return to it with a renewed sense of excitement and fun. Not to be judgmental, but anyone who is just going through the motions in anything… Well, they need to reconsider what they are doing. Life’s too short to limit your options… Or your life.

Joe, out.

I may post some thoughts tomorrow (when I recover) but until then here are some of the photos I took at the Star Trek KHAAANNN! in Las Vegas, still in progress (as of the time of this posting). I had to get home early because I’m traveling to Sydney for work again Monday and need some time to recover from all the “trekadence” before then.

Before this latest trip to the land Down Under I got stuck in LA for a day, so I did what all smart people stranded in the land of movies did… I turned tourist, with the help of my lovely friend @televixen. Here’s some pics, including some shots of stuff from the newest Star Trek movie being displayed in the Hollywood Museum downtown (look, it’s the Medical Tricorder!)…

Warning: This post contains extreme geekery and wish-fulfillment and should not be considered as anything more than my blue-sky fantasy on my part. I think it is a good idea, and hope that someone somewhere with the ability to “make it so” is reading…

One of the many things that Star Trek doesn’t have that its rival space epic Star Wars has is a tourist attraction. Star Trek used to have the great Star Trek Experience attraction in Las Vegas, but that has been gone for over 18 months now. Star Wars has the long running (and soon to be revamped) Star Tours ride at Disneyland and Disney World, and Disney also offers the Star Wars weekends special events every year in Orlando.

Yes, Star Trek has a traveling exhibition, which is cool, but it’s not like the Experience was – a must-see destination for Trekkers like me. They are still trying to get the Experience revived but the economy – especially in the troubled Las Vegas region – is not helping matters. So, I thought to myself as I was daydreaming the other day, how do you do a permanent Star Trek destination on the cheap?

The answer came in a flash. Retheming.

Retheming is the term used when a theme park attraction is, in affect, “re-skinned”; When a new tie-in or story is applied to an old attraction, to leverage the legacy hardware and building. And no one does it better than Disney.

Disney has rethemed buildings at their parks numerous times, a fairly recent example being when they changed a mostly-empty stage building to the American Idol Experience at Disney’s Hollywood Studios. It’s cheap (compared to building a new attraction), it’s relatively quick to implement, and can draw people in who would not have gone to the “old” attraction before.
I have three retheming ideas Disney can use if they cut a deal to license Star Trek (which would not be unprecedented – Universal licenses Star Trek form Paramount for an attraction in the 1980s).

Option 1: Stitch’s Great Escape. Instead of having Stitch in the center of the auditorium, have a Borg be the specimen that has been captured. Enhance the ride with two or three cast members in Borg outfits browsing through the audience.. and give the audience Phasers attached to their seats that can let them defend themselves. Leave in the dark, scary moments and re-theme the entryway and signage to be Starfleet. It’s already been rethemed once before, why not again?

Option 2: Innoventions. Add Star Trek theming to Innoventions, and surround the new inventions to a Star Trek scenario. Have the cast members don the red, blue and gold tunics and divide the areas into science, engineering and command. Sell Star Trek merchandise in the carts in front of both entrances.

Option 3: Mission Space. This is one of my favorite rides at Epcot, and features a great spaceflight simulator that (unfortunately) not a lot of people ride nowadays. The thing is, the ride uses a fictional space agency and a futuristic space ship you pilot…. So how hard would it be to replace the agency with Star Trek and the space ship with a long-range shuttle in the ride film? Not very, I think. Rebrand the whole thing “Starfleet Academy”, put the cast members in Trek uniforms, and then rebrand the Advanced Training Lab play area and gift shop. Heck, you can even add on to the building and create a quick-service area/bar like Quarks (from the Star Trek Experience) or you can use the nearby (and mostly abandoned) Odyssey Center for the new Quarks Bar and Restaurant… Or a Star Trek museum.

It’s this last option – rebranding Mission Space – is the most ambitious and the one that I think would resonate with the most folks (it would also take away from the stigma the ride had after two people died on it the past few years). Of course, all this would cost money, and Disney is already tying up a lot of cash with a refresh of Fantasyland…

But I can’t help that it would work. As we saw with last year’s Star Trek reboot, a lot of people still love the property and a lot of new fans were created from the film. It would be expensive but not THAT expensive. And it could live up to the promise of Epcot, the city of the future. What’s more futuristic than Star Trek?

Anyway, it’ll probably never happen. But a man can dream…

As you may have seen from many of my other posts here, I’m a big Star Trek fan. Big Big fan. When I got the DVD of the new Trek movie last week, I immediately dived into the extras to see how the producers had pulled the rabbit out of the hat and saved the franchise. One of my favorite special features was on Ben Burtt (formerly of Lucasfilm) and his sound design for the movie. This segment repeatedly emphasized how important sound was to add subtext and reinforce key moments of the film.

Burtt also noted that the churps and beeps in the original series when the characters did something (like open a communicator or lay in a course) were always friendly and musical in tone and that alerts and warnings were almost always guttural and sharp tones. So, of course, being a user experience guy, I started thinking out applying this to my own work.

Even though I design applications for the web, I see there is obvious value in using sounds to add a layer of alerting and/or confirmation for the users. And, interestingly, the major computer operating systems follow the same design principles that Burtt noted that the original Star Trek did.

Both Windows and Macintosh operating systems have audio cues and alerts, but it is interesting to see how different the designer’s approaches are. Microsoft is much more aggressive in their use of sound, while the UI designers at Apple tend to be more minimalistic about sound design. Also, Apple’s sounds tend to be more melodic in tone and Microsoft’s more… well, the best word I can think of is “guttural” with harsh DONK sounds accompanying errors.

No judging, just observing.

I noted previously the future has already arrived, it’s just not the future we expected. If you look at the future of experience design, I think that music and sound is an important thing that we should begin to consider part of our responsibilities. In other words, when designing experiences, we need to think beyond the screen and keep sound in mind.

Patrick Stewart turns 69 today, and I can’t think of a better birthday wish for him than this:

Make it so!

This is very funny. Example:

The title says it all - Star Trek made (an estimated) $42 million this weekend, to $147 million total. Right now, I’d give 50/50 odds that the movie makes over $300 million domestic by July (and if it doesn’t it’s probably because they lose so many screens over the next two months to Up, Terminator 4, Night at the Museum, etc.).

Even if it doesn’t hit $300 million, Paramount execs must be very happy right now – and I’ll bet you they sell a lot of Star Trek merchandise thanks to this (I know I’ve helped in this regard).

Over the past week I read several early takes, from critics I respect, about how good the new Star Trek movie is. And I got really nervous. You see, I’m a Star Trek fan – at a certain point in my life I was hard core about it (like “wear the uniform at conventions and debate on who was better captain” hard core) and I still hold a special place in my heart for it – I loved the original series, warts and all, and was a fan of The Next Generation as well (never really got into the three other shows). And I was excited over what JJ Abrams was going to bring to the table to revive the concept and “franchise.”

So, my expectations for this sequel/prequel/reboot were high, and, looking at the over 90% average approval rating has from critics at Rottentomatoes.com, I was afraid that I was about to play the role of Charlie Brown, and Abrams was going to play the part of Lucy… pulling the football away, to my great disappointment (awkward metaphor, but I think it’s appropriate).

I shouldn’t have worried.

Abram’s Star Trek is a wonder, a solid piece of entertainment that makes most previous Trek movies look like TV films done for the SF Channel. It’s a damn fine piece of showmanship that reminds us, “oh, yeah, this is the guy that directed the pilot for LOST.” This is a movie that does some pretty ballsy things with the characters and the universe that doesn’t get “fixed” in the end – and thank goodness for that. Trek has notoriously played with the Big Reset Button as a plot device at some point on every show (heck, it was even a central plot point of the Trek movie Generations) – do Something Dramatic, then do a big “reset” at the end so that it didn’t REALLY happen. Trek writers have abused that plot device so much if it was a horse it would be dead, stuffed and mounted in a cowboy museum.

Here they do several dramatic things and (as they say in comic books) Nothing is the Same Again! This time they mean it – at the end of the movie, we have no idea what will happen next to these characters. Will they ever meet Khan? Will they ever go to the gangster planet? Will they ever visit the Guardian of Forever (probably not – Harlan’s suing). Who knows. The producers now have carte blanche to revisit stuff that was in the original show, or ignore it completely. As someone who has seen “continuity porn” being the albatross around Trek’s neck for some time, I couldn’t be happier.

Star Trek can be new again.

Enough about the reboot, let’s talk about the cast. EVERYONE is outstanding here, but I have to call out Karl Urban as “Bones” McCoy… or, at least, that’s what the credits SAY the actor’s name is. They can’t fool me – it’s obvious that JJ has perfected time travel, and was able to pluck original actor DeForest Kelley off the Desilu backlot circa 1965 and get him to do this movie. Pretty canny trick, saying this “Urban” guy played the part. Uh-huh… sure.

Chris Pine is a bloody movie star after this movie, and deservedly so – the movie rests clearly on his shoulders and he delivers the goods – after watching him, he almost made me like his take on the character more than Shatner’s – no small feat. Zachary Quinto as Spock was an absolute shock – he is fantastic as Spock, and I congratulate him of rising to the challenge of playing the character opposite Leonard Nimoy – talk about a situation that invites head-to-head comparisons…

I can rattle on for another couple of hundred words, but I don’t see the point, because most of the content that would be contained in those extra paragraphs could be summarized by the words “exciting,” “awesome,” “fantastic,” and “kick ass.”

Star Trek is back, baby, and I’m feeling the same adrenaline rush I felt when another old favorite, Doctor Who, was rebooted for a new generation of fans a while back. Trek is entertaining the masses again, and I can’t wait for more.

Thanks’ JJ. You have the conn.

Copied from my old blog, circa 2005 (source: an old Slashdot thread).

12. Specifications are for the weak and timid!

11. This machine is a piece of GAGH! I need dual processors if I am to do battle with this code!

10. You cannot really appreciate Dilbert unless you’ve read it in the original Klingon.

9. Indentation?! — I will show you how to indent when I indent your skull!

8. What is this talk of ‘release’? Klingons do not make software ‘releases’. Our software ‘escapes’ leaving a bloody trail of designers and quality assurance people in its wake.

7. Klingon function calls do not have ‘parameters’ — they have ‘arguments’ — and they ALWAYS WIN THEM.

6. Debugging? Klingons do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak.

5. I have challenged the entire quality assurance team to a Bat-Leth contest. They will not concern us again.

4. A TRUE Klingon Warrior does not comment his code!

3. By filing this SCR you have challenged the honor of my family. Prepare to die!

2. You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you stand!

1. Our users will know fear and cower before our software. Ship it! Ship it, and let them flee like the dogs they are!

Here it is, the promised review of the Star Trek: the Exhibition, currently housed at the San Diego Air and Space Museum (it will be moving to another venue in January).
I had the good fortune of being able to go to both this and the Las Vegas Star Trek Experience before it closed within the span of three months, so I am able to compare both. My basic opinion of the Exhibition is this – as a stand-alone thing, it’s pretty cool. Comparing it to the Vegas Experience, however, it feels incomplete. More on that later.

The way the Exhibition is laid out is pretty cool – you enter a foyer area that has a huge obelisk with the “where no one has gone before” speech engraved on it, and behind that is a massive revolving original 1701-A Enterprise (which is very much lacking in detail and accuracy – this definitely was NOT a shooting model). There are various gold-painted models of the ships of Starfleet next to a monitor running a video montage of scenes from the movies and shows.

Then, the highlight (for me): the bridge from the original series, recreated.
If you are a classic Trek fan, this is as close as you will get to the original set that you’ll find in a public venue, and it’s worth the price of admission just to be there. You get to sit in the captain’s chair (or anywhere else, for that matter, if for example you want to man the helm) and have your picture taken (which you can later purchase, for $22). Of course, I bought mine.
(Now, I can nitpick the fact that it is not the complete bridge – it cuts out a chunk of the segments between Spock’ station and the viewscreen – or the fact that the layout of some stations are inaccurate, but I’m not that big a geek.)

Next (after security had to pull me away from the bridge) you have an original series “costume hall” that also features one of the $1000 original series Enterprise models from Master Replicas (it’s gorgeous) as well as collection of props from the original series. I have no idea if any of the costumes or props are originals, though I kinda doubt it – all look “newish.”

Suddenly you are in the hallway of the Enterprise-D and facing the (closed-off) quarters of Captain Jean-Luc Picard. A Picard costume is displayed and props are scattered throughout the area (again, most were not originals). Walking past Picard’s offiice you encounter a Next Gen-era Transporter pad, which you can have your picture taken on (again, a fee applies) as well as a HUGE Borg cube model (an original shooting model, I think), a next-generation prop display, and more costumes from ST:TNG and two captain’s chairs – the Klingon Captain chair from Star Trek III and Picard’s command chair. Both these were originals, as they were roped off…

Going down the hallway you can go right or left. Going right lands you in front of a section on time travel with a HUGE replica of the Guardian of Forever, with Vic Perrin’ dialogue from “City on the Edge of Forever” playing on a loop as the Guardian lights up. Cool (and yes, you can take your picture taken leaping out of the Guardian if you want). Going left you end up in a large exhibit called “The History of The Future” which goes chronologically from right to left (?!) and starts with TOS and ends with Nemesis…. It’s very similar to the timeline that was in the Star Trek Experience, though the Experience timeline took up a lot more space and had more details and photos. A section for the new Star Trek prequel/sequel/reboot is on the far LEFT (which I guess makes sense, since the movie starts with future Spock) and is, basically, empty.

Next to the History wall is the mother-load for model fans: LOTS of models from the movies and series, almost all originals. You get the shuttlepod from the first movie, the Stargazer from ST:TNG, the USS Excelsior (from the flashback Voyager episode, NOT the movie model), a couple of alien shuttles from ST:TNG, and a (non-original) model of the Enterprise-D. Two LCD screens next to the models were showing the high- and low-lights of Trek: one was showing The Wrath of Khan, and the other showed Nemesis (shudder).

And, basically, that was it. There were two simulator Trek rides on the other side of the museum (one was down when I was there, the other was a ST:TNG sim that had you in a shuttle fighting the Borg as the pre-recorded Michael Dorn as Worf spoke to you). There were NO items for sale based on the exhibit besides the photos and magnets (yes, magnets).

So, is it worth it? Well, since you can’t get to the Experience anymore, yes, it is worth it if you are a die-hard fan. BUT if you are a casual fan, your reaction may be “meh.” I still think that if you combine both into one “tourist trap” you will have much more of a draw for the casual fan (as the Experience was much more ST:TNG era and the Exhibition is focused more on the original series, a combined attraction can cover all the bases). Even then, it won’t beat the best Star Trek exhibit I ever went to, which was the one the Smithsonian had in the early 1990s.
Check it out if you can.

UPDATE: Well, I feel stupid: found out after this review was written that the Star Trek: The Expo was originally much larger, and also contained a lot of Next Gen stuff. The San Diego Exhibition is HALF the initial show, the other half is at a museum in Arizona. Which pretty much negates my primary criticism of the San Diego exhibition…

Here’s photos from the Star Trek: The Exhibition section of the San Diego Air and Space Museum….

[Show as slideshow]

[View with PicLens]

The writers of the new Star Trek film has revealed it’s a sequel, prequel AND a reboot. Read lots about it here.

Enjoy:

[Show as slideshow]

[View with PicLens]

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Tip of the hat to the web admins and staff behind Startrek.com, the official site of the series. They updated thier site for April 1st and all of the stories are… well, just go there.

I’ve been off my game – almost two months posting with a WordPress blog (after abandoning iweb) and I have yet to post a Trek entry. Geez.

Anyway, Wil Wheaton has been doing retro-reviews of episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation for TV Squad, and thier damn good (and funny, too).

I had the pleasure to chat online with Wil a couple of times and he’s a classy guy. Keep em coming, man! 

Check them out here…